Once upon a time I was a hardcore raider in one of the
higher rated WoW guilds in the US. I raided nearly every night, and on my nights off, I played for hours upon hours farming gold and the materials I would need to make potions, food and what-not for the rest of my raid members. I was that person: The overachiever - the person who not only supplied the raid with every single thing they could want or desire, but also topped the healing meter and led some of the boss fights (even though the actual raid leaders sometimes didn't appreciate my input. =P ). It was exhausting!
When the newest expansion,
Wrath of the Lich King was announced, many guilds chilled out on the end-game content. We were all decked out in full tier 6, and all of us were very excited to take a break. I took this opportunity to split; to leave the hectic and stressful life of a raider, and to test out the waters over in casual land. With a heavy heart and a fond farewell to my wonderful guild of the past few years, I transferred my main character (a level 70 Tauren druid) to a friend’s server; intent on never having to play WoW when I did not feel like it again. Little did I know what would follow over the next few months.
I intentionally took my sweet time leveling my druid to level 80; but no sooner had I finally dinged 80, then real life took hold of me and kicked my butt. My computer broke, leaving me unable to play WoW. After a couple days of withdrawal, I learned to do new things to occupy my time… and eventually those new things became my preferred entertainment. I also moved to a new town around that time, and with a broken computer, and no internet, I slowly but surely went from a casual WoW player, to a non-WoW player. Eventually my computer was fixed and I made a timid attempt at playing again. I would sporadically log on to my roommate’s server and play on a random alt for a few minutes before getting sidetracked by something else. It went on like this for months until finally a good friend of mine asked me for a favor. He asked me to heal a raid for him once a week on my main - the druid I had not played since November. I put it off for a few weeks, always having something else to do on the particular night; but finally, the fateful day came when I had no excuses, and I had to log on to face the raiding world again.
I know a lot of people have never experienced some of the more competitive and ugly forms of raiders; those who won’t let you mess up, and make you feel like crap if you do. I assure you, they do exist. It is not all rainbows and sunshine kisses. The guild I was in for the last two years was one of those elitist guilds. They did not accept failure, or anything but the best of the best… and after three months out of the game, the raider I had been conditioned to be after all those many exhausting nights was scared to death of failing. This was a new guild, and I knew they would not care; but by now it was a terrible habit of mine to want to be the best.
After three months of not even logging into my character. Three months of patches, character changes, gear upgrades and so much new content, I was asked to heal a raid by a friend who expected me to do as well as I did back in my hardcore days. I had a couple of hours to log on and get my crap together. I had a reputation to uphold, and I wasn’t going to let a few months away from the game change that… but I would be lying if I said I was not scared. I had never raided with these people before. I barely knew them, but I was going to be damned if I let myself look like a fool. Looking back on it, I see that all my worry was for naught, because playing WoW is a lot like riding a bicycle; you never really forget how to play. But at the time, my hands were sweating, and I had a frog in my throat when I tried to talk to everyone on vent.
After a few bosses though, I was back into the swing of things; back to laughing and joking with my friends, and, despite myself, I was having a really good time. By the end of the night, I decided to go back to playing WoW more frequently and I had made a bunch of new friends. The guild leader of my friends’ guild immediately made me a member, and all at once I was sucked in to a new WoW family.
It is really nice to be part of a guild that won’t put me down if I mess up, and pats me on the back when I do well. Hardcore raiding is awesome when you have the time; but those days are over for me. Now I am going to sit back, relax, and enjoy the new content as I see fit.
